First-Time Father

Kevin writes to us: I'm going to be a father for the first time, and it's an incredible emotion. However, it also brings about conflicting feelings. I know that significant changes must happen in my life if I truly want to fulfill my role and leave an indelible mark in the heart of the little one who is about to come. What is the best advice you can give me to perform as a father in the best way?

"Dear Kevin,

The privilege of becoming a father is a transformative experience that brings a mix of emotions and responsibilities. I understand your conflicting feelings and the importance you place on performing well in your new role. Becoming a father is like planting a seed in the garden of your life. It requires care, patience, and dedication to see it grow and blossom. Just as a seed needs sunlight and water to nourish, your child needs your love, patience, and presence to flourish to their fullest potential.

My advice to you is to focus on these three fundamental elements: love, patience, and presence. Love is the foundation on which a strong and meaningful relationship with your child is built. Love them unconditionally, provide support and understanding in every stage of their life. Imagine yourself as the captain of a ship, navigating the waters of love and fatherhood. Your child is the most precious passenger aboard, trusting you to guide them on this journey. You will face storms and rough seas, but with love and patience, you will be able to lead them to a safe harbor, filled with joy and love.

Patience is an essential virtue in parenting. Recognize that your child's growth and development require time and patience. Learn to understand their needs, listen attentively, and be patient when faced with challenges or difficult moments. Allow them to make mistakes and learn from their own experiences. Remember that parenting is like building a bridge between you and your child. Each day, you lay another brick, strengthening the foundations of a strong and lasting relationship. As the bridge takes shape, you will be able to cross it together, sharing laughter, tears, and unforgettable moments.

Presence is the most valuable gift you can offer your child. Dedicate quality time to be with them, actively participate in their life, play, converse, and share special moments together. Be a positive example and guide them with your actions and words. Presence strengthens the bonds of trust and love. Your fatherly love is like a bright flame that illuminates your child's path in life. Don't be afraid to let that flame grow, for the brighter it shines, the warmer the embrace you will provide for your child.

Remember that being a father is a journey of constant learning. Enjoy every step of this beautiful journey and remember that as a father, you have the capacity to give unconditional love, infinite patience, and constant presence. Become the lighthouse that guides your child in the darkness and be the comforting embrace that accompanies them every step of the way.

Allow yourself to make mistakes and learn from them. Seek support from your partner, other parents, and available resources. Don't be afraid to ask for help when you need it. The relationship you will build with your child over the years will be unique and precious. Enjoy every moment, celebrate achievements, and support your child through their challenges. Remember that your influence as a father will be a lasting legacy in their life.

I wish you all the best in this wonderful adventure of fatherhood. May you have wisdom and joy in every step of the way.

With affection,

Aurelius"